The Sunday News
Hi Sis Noe
I DON’T know what is wrong with me. I am attracted to older women. I am 30 and I cannot sustain a relationship with women of my age, I find the sex boring. The sex I have with older women is always mind-blowing. Is something wrong with me? — Worried.
Reply
I believe age is just a number. Age differences between partners might raise some people’s eyebrows because it is not considered the norm. To that end, some folks might not want to accept that older people are sexual and sexually desired. But, if both you and your partner enjoy your time together, getting passionate with a pensioner is a perfectly acceptable way to explore and enjoy your sexuality. While your preference for older women might not be common, it doesn’t mean it’s wrong. In fact, you might even discover benefits to seeking the sexual solace of a golden-ager.
Maybe sex is more fun, or kinkier. Maybe you will learn some new bedroom tricks from your more mature mate.
Maybe you will find that you have amazing pillow talk about how the world has changed since the times of yore. My point is that as long as you and your partner feel respected and safe, communicate openly, and are consenting adults — the details of with whom, when, and where you are intimate are totally up to the two of you!
Hi Sis Noe
Each time I urinate after sex I experience a burning sensation. This sensation only happens after sex. I do not feel any pain at all. — Worried.
Reply
The symptoms you are experiencing are uncomfortable, but quite common and may be attributed to several different causes. Some pain may be indicative of a more serious issue. Having pain when you urinate is typically attributed to an infection in the reproductive or urinary tract. Inflammation of the urethra is one of the most common causes of discomfort seen in sexually active men. Your pain may also be a result of bacterial sexually transmitted infection.
The best way to know if an STI is the source of your pain is to get tested. Doing that now is a good idea, too, because a bacterial infection left untreated can spread and evolve. It may also be possible that the type of sex you are having contributes to the source of your pain.
For example, some studies show that there is a link between men who have anal sex and symptoms such as pelvic pain, overactive bladder, and discomfort while urinating. Other non-infectious causes may result from changing the condoms, lubricant, spermicide, or soap you use, or it may also be an allergic reaction or sensitivity to the ingredients in these products. Perhaps trying a new type of lube or condom might help rule out some possibilities. If and when you experience this pain again, or if it persists over time, your best bet is to seek out medical attention.
Hi Sis Noe
I am married to a beautiful woman but she does not like sex. I am thinking of cheating. Am I justified to do that? Is extramarital sex always wrong? — Starved.
Reply
Sex that occurs outside marriage or extramarital sex is always wrong. Such kind of sex outside of marriage is damaging to the partnership. I urge you not to do it. Try to work things out with your wife. If there is no solution, walking away is an option.
Hi Sis Noe
I broke up with my boyfriend last month after I found out he was cheating on me. The problem is that I have just discovered that I am pregnant and I don’t know what to do. I now don’t love him and I am well employed and I can take care of my baby alone. What do I do? — Confused.
Reply
All of your feelings are very normal and realistic. You have gone through some significant life events in the past few weeks. Ending a serious relationship, and finding out you are pregnant, these are not small potatoes. The good news is that whether you decide to tell your ex and how you choose to move forward with the pregnancy is solely up to you. The not so great news is that these types of decisions are not always easy or clear-cut. Taking some time to consider how you feel about your options and reaching out to those close to you will likely help you determine what course of action is right for you.
And one thing you must keep in mind is that your ex will ask whether that’s his baby and if you lie it will come back to haunt you in future. He might demand custody and there is a high possibility that your child will want to know his father. Your relationship with your ex did not end on the best terms, so it’s no wonder that you feel conflicted about whether to tell him about your pregnancy. To help you decide if and when you want to let him know, it might be helpful to reflect on your own feelings about the pregnancy and his potential reactions.
Do you think he would want to know that you are pregnant, no matter the outcome, or would he prefer to stay in the dark? Taking into account both of your feelings may help you decide how much information to disclose. You may decide that your pregnancy is a personal issue and that you don’t want to share with your ex — and that’s completely fine. Perhaps you imagine that telling him will leave both of you worse off and that it’s better to keep your distance. Whether or not you tell your ex that you are pregnant, consider talking to a trusted advisor (such as a friend, family member, or pastor) first. Good luck and I hope you make the right decision.
Hi Sis Noe
I am 28-year-old single man staying in Gutu. I need a serious lady aged between 20 and 25.
I am looking for a serious lady, a churchgoer. I am a divorcee with three kids, 36 years of age, am working in South Africa, no chancers, ready to start a new life. The lady should be 25 to 32 years old.
I am a man aged 38, looking for a single mother living in Bulawayo.
I am a man of 37 years looking for a lady aged 25 to 33 around Bulawayo.
I’m in Harare, I want a single businesswoman in Harare as I m also a single businessman. I am aged 41 and the woman should be aged 35 to 45. Thank you.
I am a man 48, in Kariba looking for a lady to settle down with.
I am a 31-year-old single lady, looking for a man aged 31 to 35, who is God-fearing, preferably a civil servant who is ready to settle down.
I am a 28-year-old woman looking for a man to date. I have two kids and the man must be mature, aged 30 to 35.
Divorced men are most welcome.
I am a 35-year-old woman who wants to be in a relationship with a man who is prepared to settle down.
I am a 36-year-old divorced mother of four in Hwange. I am looking for a man with children who wants to settle down.
I am a single lady aged 30 in need of a man aged 30 to 40.
I’m a man aged 30, I’m looking for a lady aged 20-28 in Gweru or Bulawayo.
I am a woman aged 30 in Bulawayo. I am looking for a man to settle down with. He should be 32 to 43 years old.
I am a 40 year old woman based in Hwange. I am searching for a man aged 40 to 50. I dont have a child.
Reply
For the numbers of the above people send a WHATSAPP message to 0773111328. Do not send an SMS; we do not have money to respond to an SMS. If you want an SMS response then your request should include airtime. Do not call; we do not entertain phone calls.
