The Sunday News
Talking Spiritually Rev Paul Bayethe Damasane
TODAY, dear reader, I would like us to handle a subject that is very sensitive in the sense that it is very personal. Very few of us in the Church actually speak out about it openly. We know it exists among us yet we are not brave or bold enough to accept that God can help us contend with it. I strongly believe that we are able to deal with anything as long as we put our mind to it. In this case what I refer to as our mind is really our spirit.
The word of God is very direct in that it helps us see things differently. Let us deal with the current phenomenon that has come to be known by the euphemism, “same-sex attraction”. I have a clear problem understanding how a man can really be sexually attracted to another man when women are so attractive and so many are around us. I have even seen that in my short life women have learnt to dress better and make themselves more attractive today than they did say 30 years ago!
I will be honest with you to say there are men out there who have this untoward attraction to other men. Not to mention also that there are women who are attracted to other women when handsome men are following Peter Matika’s advice on how to dress and attract women!
Whether sexual orientation can change or not, hearts can change and turn any sexual orientation into an occasion for the glory of Christ. This is glorifying God in celebrating that which He created for His glory and you turning it back to Him. When Paul says, You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body (1 Corinthians 6:19–20), he did not exclude people with same-sex attraction.
Feasting and fasting have always been ways of glorifying Christ with food. Similarly sexual relations in marriage and sexual abstinence outside marriage have always been ways of glorifying Christ with our sexuality. You can always give your body up for God’s glory no matter what reality the body seems to suggest to you. You can turn it to the reality and creative intention He has for you as God.
The Bible is not unclear that same-sex attraction is disordered (Romans 1: 26–27), and that same-sex intercourse (as all adultery and fornication) is sin (1 Corinthians 6: 9). Therefore, those with same-sex attraction glorify Christ through sexual abstinence and through the enrichment of significant Christ-exalting relationships in other ways. Simply said is that they can change to another behaviour form by choice. This is true whether there are genetic roots of same-sex attraction and whether the attraction can be changed.
There are not simply three groups: Heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual. There are hundreds of variations of impulses that make up our peculiar sexual identities. Change is therefore not a movement from one of three groups to another of three groups. Rather, it is a total reconfiguration of dozens of impulses and desires by a spiritual intervention from above. These desires and impulses are interwoven with dozens of personal and relational and spiritual realities, all of which are moving and shifting as God and his word and his people come to bear on the totality of a person’s life.
There is no way around it. Dealing with same-sex attraction is messy. There are many issues that, at least on the surface, do not seem clear. Some people for example will ask, “Is same-sex attraction itself sinful, and if so, how should we deal with it?” Here is my humble attempt at an answer. Taking our cues from the Bible one has to note briefly three biblical observations.
The Bible explicitly says that impenitent homosexual acts keep a person from inheriting the kingdom of God. “Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revellers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6: 9–10).
Further, the Bible does not seem to explicitly mention same-sex attraction. It is possible that the “dishonourable passions” in Romans 1: 26 could be referring to same-sex attraction.
And thirdly our passions may be disordered by the fall of this creation, and yet be distinct from active sinning. Paul said, “the creation was subjected to futility . . . (and will one day) be set free from its bondage to corruption” (Romans 8: 20–21). Even Spirit-filled believers groan under this “futility” and “corruption,” including “dishonourable passions.” “We ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies” (Romans 8: 23).
Understanding the above three realities, it seems right to say that homosexual practice is active sinning. Consequently it would be right to say that same-sex desires are sinful in the sense that they are disordered as sin and exist contrary to God’s revealed will. But to be caused by sin and rooted in sin does not make a sinful desire equal to sinning. Sinning is what happens when rebellion against God expresses itself through our disorders. While same-sex attraction is a disordered desire, owing to the fall and thus rooted in sin and broken by sin, nevertheless experiencing it is not in itself an act of sinning until you groom it into life. So reject it as it comes.
When I say that experiencing it is not in itself an act of sinning it is because experiencing a general orientation is not a sin per se. In our sin nature, all of us are disordered sexually.
There clearly is a biblical category for being tempted without sinning. Jesus was tempted in every respect, yet remained without sin (Hebrews 4: 15), and James 1: 14–15 distinguishes between temptation that leads to sin, and sin itself. However, it seems impossible to determine when exactly we have crossed the line from temptation into sin.
For example, how long can I experience the desire before I fight it, and still be blameless? Two seconds? Ten seconds? Half a second? Because Jesus is God, he never crossed the line between temptation and sin — though he knew the agony. But because I am finite and fallen, I cannot definitively discern this line.
Therefore, even though it is possible to be tempted without sinning, it seems wise to agree with David when he says, “Who can discern his errors? Declare me innocent from hidden faults” (Psalm 19 :12). I always want to say to the Lord, “If there was any sin in the way I handled that temptation, I am sorry. Keep me from it in the future.”
To conclude this discussion same-sex attraction is the result of a broken creation, and in that sense it is “sinful” or “dishonourable” (Romans 1: 26). It is an effect of the fall. However, experiencing it is not the same as sinning. Rather, same-sex attractions should be treated like any temptation to sin. They should be fought with blood-earnestness in a way that recognises the deceitfulness of the heart and the finitude of the mind.
When I do this — when I fight temptation, turn to Jesus, trust his promises, and rely on his Spirit — God is pleased. He is not mainly displeased because I need to fight, but pleased because I am fighting.
This is good news for all of us who experience all manner of temptations! May this fact lead us, no matter our particular groaning, to rest in Jesus more deeply, fight temptation more fiercely, and look forward to the day when our fight of faith will result in “praise and glory and honour at the revelation of Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 1: 7). Fighting temptation is having power over your body and always realising that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Till next week, Shalom!
