Just because i am woman

20 Jul, 2014 - 01:07 0 Views

The Sunday News

BECAUSE I am a woman, this column, like many of my others, has been inspired not only by my life events, but also by my favourite source of guilty pleasures listening to people’s conversations, guilty as charged. I heard women being labelled as gold-diggers, as I listened to a certain conversation only to realise that this woman was being lashed out at simply because she had asked brother man to get a job, really is that gold digging? I do not think so. I have had discussions about relationships, what women want, and what men want. From the comments I have determined that the common theme in my findings is that men think all women are gold-diggers.

Men think that a woman who wants to be with a man who has a job or steady income is a gold-digger. I think that a gold-digger is a woman that wants to be taken care of, but she’s not bringing anything to the table, she just wants you to do everything for her and she does nothing at all.
Women want a man who will be an equal partner in the relationship, a man who will contribute both financially and emotionally.

I have heard some men say that she should love me for me or I want to know that she doesn’t just love me for my money. Well those things are understandable I mean there are real gold-diggers out there.

Because I am a woman I know that there’s nothing wrong with a person being concerned about your financial stability. A long-term partnership means depending on each other through the ups and downs, and being financially reliable does help with that to a degree. The difference between a gold- digger and someone who values your role as a provider is that the gold-digger would deride and perhaps leave you if you lost your ability to provide for them financially.

A good person can appreciate your financial resources, but a gold digger appreciates only that, and will not see the relationship as worthwhile if you’re not well off. A good woman will encourage you to follow your dreams while simultaneously helping you think of ways to do it practically and responsibly that is not gold digging at all.

Gone are the days when, “If you couldn’t earn the money, you married the money!” Now, if you marry the money, you STILL have to earn money, at whatever cost! I have never had the luxury of not working; can someone come and free me? The idea of most women wanting to be financially independent is a reality in today’s world, I doubt if there’s still a sane woman who wakes up to look pretty so they can go gold digging. Most of the women I know are independent career women who do not use marriage as an alternative or supplement to their employment careers.

In today’s economy, both partners must contribute financially in order for these dreams to be realised. So my advice to men is, step up your game and do something to be financially stable. Yes, be wary of the real gold-digger, but realise that most women just want a man who can take care of his responsibilities so be that man. Well, if that is the case, then yes, I am a gold-digger. So are all of my friends and every other woman out there. But men are misinformed, I am not looking for a man who has a job so that I can stay home and do nothing all day, then one day divorce him and take all his money.

I am not looking for a man who makes over $200 000 per year (though I admit that would probably be nice). All I want is a man who has a stable source of income and can take care of himself. That is all my friends and other women want too. Why is that bad?

In my culture it is very necessary to provide for your family. It is the man’s sole responsibility. It is what creates him the head of the household since they so much want to be called heads of the house. She needs to be provided and protected so she can concentrate on her duties as a woman and not have to worry about paying the bills, protecting her children from harm, and feel secure enough to love the man that provides for her unconditionally.

The male species is built to be the provider and the protector. On average and on every level that judges what gender is the strongest and the tallest, the male wins hands down. The males’ major job is to provide and protect his family and his group. Ask yourself what woman does not want a man that can or have the means to take care of them. If you as a woman think you are so independent, would you date a man without a job or goals? But that’s another issue for another day . . . Till next week let’s keep talking 0773089395.

Feedback:
In your article on Sunday you were talking to me thank you so much for giving me strength. Your article had a huge impact in my life and I am changing my attitude towards life. — 0716022149

Hi sis, wow nice column, I am inspired thank you for inspiring us as women and as ladies we need to know that there is a time for everything and we need to be patient because everything comes at the right time. Thank you for educating us. — 0771017209.

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