Just lift the middle finger

15 Oct, 2017 - 02:10 0 Views
Just lift the middle finger

The Sunday News

middle finger

Nhlalwenhle Ncube

IN as much as one has to understand that the heart does not choose who to love, at times there are some people who just need to be shown the middle finger whenever they claim to have fallen in love with you. Their sentiments will just be an insult, leaving you without an option but to immediately tell them to get lost.

Wondering what I am talking about? You know that situation when someone you consider to be family suddenly shocks you by claiming to be in love with you. It is one frustrating incident because most of the times you will not be expecting such a ‘‘bomb’’ in your face. I am talking about a situation where your best friend’s daughter, out of the blue, suddenly tells you that she has a crash on you. Or your friend’s spouse says the same thing. These people are more of family, but surprisingly it turns out they do not have innocent intentions.

Yes, it is unthinkable in the sense that the person you have been treating as your ‘‘own’’ daughter wants to be intimate with you. If it is your friend’s husband or wife, it is also tricky as you will be family and at times that is the person you will be running to when having your own marital problems.

He/she wakes up and claims to be in love with you. The situation presents you with a difficult choice, it’s a damning one if I may say.

Most of the times, no one wants to be the reason for breaking up friendship ties and it becomes difficult to share with your partner or friend. At the same time just telling that person you are not interested in him/her might seem not to be enough.

It is then the time that I will advise whoever finds himself or herself in such a tight corner to be brave enough and show the middle finger.

Do not be afraid that he/she will start hating you because it is better than being caught on the wrong side by your friend. Just imagine your friend discovering that you are flirting with his wife or daughter?

You will just begin to curse the day she/he proposed you and you falling for it. In actual fact, learn to lift your middle finger and stand your ground because the truth is you cannot please everyone on this earth’s surface.

Never entertain people with crazy thoughts, sexual or otherwise! Of course, the common excuse which can make you get carried away is being told that the heart is never straightforward, has no written formula or a book that one can read to equip himself or herself on what it really wants. But as a human being you have to know your limits and boundaries. There should be a difference between human beings and animals. Tell whosoever that wants to act like an animal that you are not one and will never be, therefore he/she should stay away from you. Period.

Of course, it is unfortunate that some men have been proposed by their friend’s teenage daughters who seem to fantasise a lot and it is so heartbreaking. Never entertain these crazy girls because the day you decide to cut ties with them, you might find yourself in trouble or jail. It is because of such situations we find someone being accused for “rape”. Who will believe your story when you are behind bars? Be alert, you better disappoint her than to get yourself in trouble.

The warning finger’s flexibility has always found its wagging stamina after the error has already taken its devastating toll. Better use your finger when there is still time than to wait until it’s too late.

FEEDBACK

I enjoyed your last week’s article, but lami I have feelings for my wife’s sister. I am just in love with her and though she has not yet agreed we spend a lot of time together. I have expressed my feelings and all she says is that she is afraid of her sister if it happens and if she discovers about the relationship. I have known her for more than 15 years, but just fell in love with her two months ago. I just can’t help it and am crazy about her. I know it’s wrong, but I love her so much. I have got to a point where I wake up in the middle of the night as I will be thinking about her. She is also married, but makes time for me as well.

You are right, people should learn to stay away from their siblings’ partners. I was impregnated by my sister’s husband and because of that they divorced. Unfortunately our relationship never lasted and I lost two people in my life, the man and my sister. I now realise my mistake, but my sister does not want to forgive me.

In response to your Sunday Life article ‘‘Married, but available: wrong turn!’’ You are posting the right thing especially looking at the society’s moral values. But looking at the deep inside of the heart, married men care a lot compared to singles who can shift goal posts from time to time. Married men rarely escape when the girlfriend falls pregnant or has some challenges. They have experiences from their legal families and believe they can go an extra mile unlike singles who consider fashion as a need.

Thank you for your heartbreak articles, I have learnt a lot and most times it’s as if you writing for me.

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