The Sunday News
THE social media has in the last couple of weeks been awash with a four minute long video of a Ugandan domestic worker brutally torturing an 18-month-old toddler, Arnella Kamanzi, at the Kampala home where she is employed as a child minder.
Baby Arnella has arguably been the most passionately discussed topic on social media, with all sorts of perspectives being forwarded with regards to the conduct of house maids when their employers are not at home.
In the video, a visibly angry Jolly Tumuhirwe is seen feeding baby Arnella using a spoon, forcefully putting the spoon in her mouth and angrily barking at her while she herself partakes of her food from the same plate and spoon.
The baby vomits on the floor. Tumuhirwe pauses, gathers her anger and viciously throws the baby off the couch, hitting her head on the tiled floor.
She follows her, spanks her severely with a torch as the girl cries her heart out. She then kicks her and puts her entire weight on the girl’s back before dragging her to the washroom, where the recording ends.
In Zimbabwe, this got people thinking of an incident that took place a couple of years ago when a heartless HIV positive Gutu domestic worker served her employer’s four-year-old daughter with porridge mixed with her menstrual blood in a bid to fix the mother.
The then 17-year-old maid, Pelagia Mureya, was caught lacing the porridge of the four-year-old child with her own menstrual blood and later tests showed that the child was now HIV positive.
She was only discovered when her employer “noticed a drop of blood when her child was eating porridge, and investigated”. Mureya was arrested in Mupandawana, Gutu district, but professed ignorance of the blood.
She was, however, jailed for eight months after tests carried out at Gutu Rural Hospital confirmed that it was her menstrual blood.
The above two scenarios have seen the emergence of the old debate questioning the safety of the home and children left under the care of domestic workers.
Arguments have further bordered on the structure of the modern day family where both the mother and father are seen working, leaving them no choice but to engage a third party to take care of the home and the children, if any.
This being a divergence from the traditional patriarchal roles within a family as prescribed by our culture, where the man is expected to work while the wife remains at home taking care of the children.
Though many parents employ a maid to assist them in the household, the bulk of parenting duties should still be the parents’ responsibility.
Housemaids have become an integral part of family life as they provide the much-needed support to parents who often don’t have extended family around to assist with childcare, or parents with careers who are often left with little choice as they require help to carry out their family responsibilities.
It’s fair to say that commitment and devotion towards a successful career and rearing a child requires sacrifice and no small amount of resolve and effort for both to work out in tandem.
These and other factors prompt most parents to employ a housemaid, helper or caregiver to assist them in carrying out their roles and responsibilities — the notion being that maids would provide the much-needed help around the house and allow parents more freedom and time to spend with their children.
Matters like potty-training, swimming and riding a bicycle, learning not to bully other kids, learning from mistakes and forgiving other people for them, are all lessons that can be outsourced from maids or helpers, even professionals. But just because it can be done, doesn’t mean that it should.
In more developed countries such as the United States, outsourced parenting often means getting professionals to teach your child certain skills or behaviours, such as sleep training or basic etiquette, provided that you can afford such services.
Having a maid can be a boon, and can enable you to ensure work-life balance and harmony. It could also be a perfect solution to spend more time with your child, but you must take charge of your own life and that of your little one.
It has to be noted that most parents make the mistake of ill-treating their house maids and due to such the caregivers end up “offloading” on innocent children. Some parents forget that their children spend the bulk of their time with the caregivers hence they play an intergral part in the children’s psychological and physical upbringing.
As we continue to debate on this issue, Sunday News this week managed to interview a number of key stakeholders questioning the politics behind employing maids and entrusting them with one’s home and children.
Zimbabwe Domestic Allied Workers Union secretary general Mr Hillary Ruyi said within an work setup communication was key, hence the only way to address any possible friction between the employer and domestic worker has to be reciprocated communication.
“As a union we continue encouraging our members to be hardworking, honest and communicate with their employer whenever they feel something is amiss. We believe that if there is communication nothing like what we saw on that Ugandan video will occur. One thing that we must always realise is that the domestic worker is also human and should not be treated otherwise. Yes they are employed but I see no reason in tossing them around and taking advantage of them,” said Mr Ruyi.
He said although in Zimbabwe such abuse, as the one experienced by Baby Arnella was not rampant or could be going unreported, as a union, they ensured that they engage both the domestic workers and the employees to avoid the occurrences.
“The problem arises when the would-be employers just randomly employ domestic workers without checking their criminal records or even experience. We encourage people to either approach the police when they want to employ someone to check on their background or even come to us as we have a ready database of people who are our members looking for employment. The advantage of these people being that they were trained by us and in case of any eventuality, we have all their details.
“Cutting corners does not really work because those are the very people who start giving the employers problems at the end of the day,” said Mr Ruyi.
An official from Childline, who declined to be named, confirmed that as an organisation they had handled a number of cases where domestic workers were reported to be abusing children by their caregivers.
“Although I cannot give you the figures for professional reasons I can confirm that indeed we receive tip-offs regarding caregivers ill-treating children left under their care, some of the cases were even referred to the police.
“What we do is we talk and counsel the victims, talk to the employer and caregiver so that we get to the bottom of the issue. However, we have realised that in some cases the children are reluctant to report such cases knowing that they spend a huge chunk of their time with these caregivers,” said the official.
Ms Jacqueline Ncube, a single mother of two, said although she had never had a major problem with her own domestic worker, interactions with her colleagues revealed a different picture.
She said the trick was trust, where both employer and employee should create a bond that will see them developing a positive working environment.
“You find that some people even give their maids paltry salaries which they themselves would never accept when offered yet they expect the maid to give them 100 percent services. Yes at times the maids are wrong but as parents we should also be considerate because these are the very people we entrust with our homes and children,” said Mrs Ncube.
Parents should not forget that a good customer service can be a right step in the right direction. A warm thank you to express your genuine appreciation can be an effective emotional tool for someone who had a bad day.
Remember, except blood donors, everyone who makes a living in an old-fashioned way is selling “something’’ to the public.
Sow a good seed in someone’s heart; perhaps you or your offspring will reap a good harvest one day when you least expect to.
Decades of the disappearing of cultural custodians and deepening self-deceit have impaired our moral core and the society’s immune system to fight any immoral diseases. But where do we go from here as a society if we fail to inoculate ourselves against arrogance, hate, resentment, greed, distain, skepticism, apathy and inequality?
Let us treat our domestic workers with respect and on the other hand the domestic workers should appreciate that theirs is an important service which they should perform without fear or favour.
