The Sunday News
Hi Sis Noe
MY workmate and I have been having an affair for nine months and I thought it was heading somewhere. However, he has just admitted he still has sex with his wife to keep the peace at home. I saw her recently and couldn’t believe how different to me she is. She is really beautiful — how he can fancy us both when we are so unalike. Do I not mean anything to him? — Worried.
Reply
Surely you must accept that your colleague is behaving very badly. He is cheating on his wife and misleading you. I suspect he is thoroughly enjoying the best of both worlds while being grossly selfish and unfair. If his marriage is ongoing, and he is still having sex with his wife, what is your role? It doesn’t matter what his wife looks like. Stop wasting your time. Be proactive and find someone of your own. I don’t understand why you are indulging this individual in the first place — and I don’t believe your bosses can approve.
Hi Sis Noe
My wife now prefers to masturbate than to have sex with me. She also uses toys such as vibrators that her sister bought for her in South Africa. We used to have a lot of sex together but now she avoids me. I also know that she flirts with other men. — Help.
Reply
Your wife needs to hear that she is being extremely insensitive and cruel. Tell her. Locking herself in her private love den, while you are left floundering outside, is insulting in the extreme. Sadly, neither of you is talking about the big issue here — namely the fact that she is going off in her own direction. I urge you to find the courage to talk to her honestly and sincerely. Park your embarrassment and explain that you love her and respect her and miss her touch. Tell her that you long to be close again. Ok, so she loves sex toys, but can’t you play with them together? Why do they have to be for her sole use? As for her talking dirty to other people, doesn’t she understand how disloyal you feel that is? Offer to take things slowly. Suggest a relaxing evening and an early night so you can cuddle and see what develops. If she accuses you of being set in your ways, then offer to change. Ask her what she could like you to do to shake up your sex life. Ultimately, however, she must be prepared to meet you halfway and accept she is being selfish. If she really won’t, then would she be happier without you on a full-time basis? The ball is in her court.
Hi Sis Noe
I cheated on my boring boyfriend with my neighbour who loves partying when I was drunk. Since then we have been having great sex. My boyfriend takes care of me and meets all my needs but he is so boring. Should I leave him? — Confused.
Reply
You had sex with your exciting and party loving neighbour while you were under the influence of alcohol. Now you have sobered up and everything has changed. There is no getting away from the fact that you have cheated, lied and behaved appallingly and should be ashamed of yourself. What did your hard-working partner ever do to deserve this monumental slap in the face? He may be (in your words) boring, but if he has never hurt or let you down, then he really does deserve better. I suggest you start being the bigger person and ask for a face-to-face chat. You have got to explain what has been going on, before someone else does. If you live in a close-knit community then this juicy bit of gossip will inevitably get out. I understand that you are wonderfully in lust with your sexy neighbour, but can you honestly see yourself living the rest of your life in his arms? Is he worth giving everything up for? I urge you to think very carefully about what you are doing and where you are heading. If you genuinely don’t care for your long-time partner any more, then you must let him go. But you should be wary of rushing straight into a relationship with a guy you hardly know because you could end up finding yourself lost and unhappy.
SOULMATES
I am a single mother of two aged 34 looking for a man between 36 to 43 years who wants a serious relationship. No married men please.
Ndiri mukadzi ane makore 43, ndodawo munhu wekufambidzana naye ane 46 years and above from Gweru or Bulawayo.
Shalom. Can you connect me with a lady aged 36 to 40, seriously searching for a lifetime partner especially from Bulawayo. I am 52, single, HIV-positive and I’ve been through many disappointments. I am ready to settle down.
I am looking for a female partner aged between 23 to 27 with or without a child, who wants a serious relationship and ready to marry by next year.
May you link me with any HIV-positive lady aged between the ages of 30 and 45. Preferably one who works. I am a civil servant. Thank you in advance sister.
I am a 43-year-old woman with two kids, looking for a man to settle down with. Never been married, I am still praying for a faithful husband. Please help.
Kindly connect me with a lady aged between 40 to 47 years of age who is serious about settling down. I am a man of 47 who is gainfully employed and a father of two who is HIV-negative. I need a professional lady of any status.
I am a man of 30. I need a woman aged between 18 to 40 who is good and caring. I have a good job and a good salary. I have one son.
I’m a woman aged 45 with two kids. I need to settle down. I am HIV negative and prepared to go for HIV tests. I need someone aged 48 to 55.
For the above numbers WhatsApp or text the number 0773 111 328. Calls will not be entertained.
