The Sunday News
Carl Maswoswa
It is not surprising and wrong to say, at some point we get overwhelmed by the many responsibilities life confronts us with.
What worsens it is the technology we have, we are constantly bombarded with news and trying to stay in the loop of what is happening; it is just stress on its own.
Something is always making headlines.
In a study carried out to identify how long a time an individual could spend without their smartphones in the 21st Century; one out of the five individuals successfully passed the test. Are you able to say today, I need to stop looking at my phone and have it on airplane mode and look at my own well-being then carry on later?
Even the machinery and technology we so much applaud, also have a point it needs to be at rest.
Many people are at the verge of losing themselves because of burnout; — the responsibility to put food on the table, making that business alive each day, getting good grades, pleasing the congregation, and being that leader everyone looks up to, but are you okay? Self-care is not taken seriously thus a lot befalls us simply because we lack the prerogative to say enough is enough; that job, congregation, business, position or institution is not everything. Your well-being matters above all. I remember one year in December refusing to go home, so as to catch up on work; finishing reports and putting every document in place.
The work was too much that I managed to finish two thirds of it. Upon completion, I was excited to be ahead. What stood ahead of me I couldn’t even imagine! I had a series of mental breakdowns, burnout and presenteeism (coming to work even when you are sick) because I could not identify my stop and say this is my bus stop.
How then do you identify this?
Are there days you feel like not getting out of bed, days you feel empty that is, physically and emotionally drained, you dread going to work, you are stressed, depressed and easily irritated, anything and everything that happens gets under your skin; it may be a sign that there is an underlying cause to this of course, coupled with other factors. In the event you feel this way, you need to ask yourself, what is happening to me?
Many a time, we do not want to hold ourselves accountable, asking ourselves those difficult questions that make us uncomfortably naked before ourselves. No one is going to tell you that you need to take a break or your well-being is important, the decision lies with you.
Do not wait until it is too late. You may make savings for your car insurance, funeral policy or reserve money for a party; not that it is wrong or unethical but are you being selfish as well with your time and wellness. When last did you go to a quiet place and listened to your thoughts?
The 21st Century Dilemma
In the abyss of trying to provide, serve or take responsibility for an institution life can happen just like that thus if you do not take inventory of the activities that surround you it can indirectly affect you in a bad way.
Who tells the Pastor or Bishop that you need time off with yourself and your family? I was having a conversation with a friend of mine (name withheld) and asked, “how is home”. The friend replied unconcerned with teary eyes and an uneasy cough at the start and eventually responded, “my parents are rarely home; I can count the number of days they are with me, they do not even know my sporting interests and even when I am stressed, I do not know who to go to, as they are always busy.”
Even the social fabric is fading away in our culture, some families no longer have get-togethers as a family to share wisdom and have fun. Some get to meet at funerals mesmerised and say, “oooh you are alive”, then they go back to their busy lives. Do we need time out?
How do you then change your situation?
As human beings we need to be well spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically, financially, socially and intellectually, just to mention a few. In the event these areas are not convincingly correct or in order, then you need to do a review and ask yourself how you can make it better. Life may have its own challenges and difficulties but you to have to find and strike a balance.
Throw yourself in the deep and learn about mental health challenges and how you can advance your knowledge in mental literacy. In this day and age, you may think it is cliché but it is important to do so. Find comfort in talking to people you value and that can assist you with non-judgemental eyes and share your problems, connecting with them emotionally. When last did you have a sleep routine of five to eight hours or you are sleeping most of the day; you need a sleeping routine that helps your body to have maximum rest to tackle today’s and tomorrow’s challenges.
Are you grateful and telling yourself you are beautiful? When last did you go to church, are you in sync with your maker? Are you making use of those off and leave days that are due to you? Do you just say I will see what the day has to offer, that mentality and attitude are destructive, have a plan for the day, months and years to follow! Ninety-nine of the problems that happen to us are either because we do not want to confront it, do not have technical know-how or we are too tired to be holding ourselves accountable. Before you stop, know your bus stop.
The writer, Carl Tanyaradzwa Maswoswa is the Founder of a Coaching and Mentoring Club at the National University of Science and Technology in partnership with International Coaching and Mentoring Foundation. Carl also has a slot on Skyz Metro FM Radio in Bulawayo, Zimbabwe as a resource person touching on self-development.
