The Sunday News
Living life to the fullest with Selusweyinkosi Mhlanga
The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall — Nelson Mandela
While we all seek success and chase our ambitions with an attitude to succeed, we can’t always control the outcome and we sometimes fail.
It’s totally okay to take a step back, be disappointed in yourself, maybe cry a little and trace your steps back to see where you went wrong. Beating yourself up, however, shouldn’t take forever. It will only depress you to stay in that state for too long. Consciously snap out of it.
How we handle failure determines how we move on from there, if we do move on at all. Failure can be seen as a stepping stone, a way of being redirected or the ultimate end, depending on how one looks at it.
What will people say ?
People have a tendency of worrying about what others will think of them after they have failed. Looking at yourself from a point of view of other people is not doing justice to yourself, it’s just self torture. As much as we all worry about our self-image we should accept that we are only human and we all make mistakes. No one expects us to be perfect so we should give ourselves a break and focus on ourselves, not other people.
People will always have something to say, probably because they don’t know you as much so you do. You are probably the only one who believes in yourself and knows why you do what you do. Focus on why you do what you do and use that drive to find ways to accomplish what you started, regardless of the obstacles that may be staring at you in the face.
Take responsibility for your failure, stop the blame game
It’s important to acknowledge failure and seek healthy ways to move on from that. Wallowing in self-pity will not do you any favours and will only keep you down longer. Get up, dust yourself and take stock of what happened. Walking down that path may be uncomfortable, but it will assist you to see where you got lost and how you can avoid the same situation from repeating itself.
If you were working with a team or you had a support team do not point fingers if something goes wrong. Accept that there has been a drawback, don’t dwell on who made the mistakes or suggested that “wrong” move. Go back to the drawing board and map another way forward. Life sometimes redirects you for a purpose or so that you learn the process.
There is always a bright side. You have a new chance to look at things from a different angle and try a new approach.
That should get you as fired up as you were the first time you embarked on that project, knowing your previous mistakes will not be repeated this time and you will make it.
Salvage something from your failure
One of the reasons we have to acknowledge failure is so that we can learn from it. When one realises what went wrong and accepts the situation it’s easier to have an open mind to do things differently than when you are stuck in your ways trying to do things the same way and expecting different results.
Seek out more opportunities and be persistent
People who have made it will advise you that persistence is the key to mastering your craft. Everyone who is good at what they do knows that it takes practice to get it right. So don’t beat yourself up when you fail a few times. Keep trying and when you get the hang of it, don’t relax, keep at it until you know you have mastered it.
The people we define as talented only grew their seed of talent by practicing their trade. No matter how talented you are, if you sit on that talent and expect to win, you’d be surprised to see mediocre performers winning at your expense. Everything grows when it’s cultivated and fed the right way, so does your talent, dream or idea.
The reason we are encouraged to avoid idleness is so that we can keep thinking and generating new ideas. When the mind is given a challenge it rises to the occasion but when you submit to failure it will shut down completely.
Your mind, including your subconscious mind, is the most loyal part of you. What you feed it, it accepts, hence the encouragement to keep a positive attitude every time so that you keep yourself fired up.
